Sunday, June 10, 2012

I decided to share the picture of my son, the one adorable thing that I have in my life...the one thing that keeps me smiling and longing to be a better me, so that I can make it better for him...:-)

Monday, June 4, 2012


It has been a while but at times, silence is golden and again...sometimes when one goes quiet it only means that better things are coming up and something serious must be cooking. I decided to take a break and concentrate at the same time refleting on issues of my life, as all of a sudden things were moving too fast for me to handle, I think... Well, last year saw me decide to throw myself back into the a sort of relationship, was on trial, but was all worht it...6 months down the line, I discovered that perhaps we both needed to re-evaluate our priorities...well put, we took a break....okay of course for the better since it seems both of us or perhaps I was too busy managing what i know best rather than the relationship at hand. Needless to say, the distance was not helping much and perhaps we both just gave up easily. Well they say if at all things are meant to be they will be eventually and sometimes its just good to let nature take its course :-) But that was a great 6 months that I had...could not have asked for more. Now 2012 brings itself and yes, this year, intresting stuff is cropping back. Let me call a spade a baby's dad has re-surface and for what? He wants me back???At this time when I had decided that I want to take the couple agenda of my topic of discussions, when I least expected that I would be going for dates, when I least expected that he would be the person who would be asking me to sit down with him and have a discussion about "our" future? Clearly, I need to be picnhed to wake up or maybe sleep and wake up again!!! I am not sayin that he is not a guy I would listen to but really, after ten good years, he shows up? And why? Because what he had has gone sour and he feels he made a wrong choice and he should have married me a long time ago? Really? I am not bitter but am just asking myself a lot of questions right now....Well at some point I wonder if I decide to do it his way, if he wont wake up one day and say he is bored with me and go back to what he left again...after ten years??? Its these questions that seem to kind of slow me down....making me think twice about the possibility of ever even listening to him. I love my life, with no stress, sometimes sleeping on the couch, sleeping hungry by choice ( coz I dont feel like cooking) and am thinking, would a marriage of convinience really be of benefit to me? And I already know the answer...especially now that I have too much to handle and less time for myself.......